Upon healing from a really life-threatening condition, I found myself being "cared-for" by my wife. She also found herself as my "care-giver" with terms of 24/7 applied to both of us.
Being a man and being taught to be and act like one in charge most of my adult life did not equipt me for a new life as a "submissive hubbie". It was (and still is at times) hard to give up just about every opportunity to make a decision for the both of us. She must grant me the benefit of her choice for everything now. Being "disabled" has made me become wholly dependent on my wife. We are in it together now, more than we have ever been before.
I find that there is some comfort in letting my wife handle everything now. However, I often feel really guilty about her doing so much of everything, that I find myself trying to please her in anyway possible. I attempt to make myself as attractive as I can on a daily basis. I try to anticipate the needs of my wife on a daily basis, and look forward to long conversations with her. However, I find that she is chronically tired most of the time now, and I get the feeling that she is not listening to me when I whine about my problems.
Do you see what is happening here? A complete role-reversal. I now have an idea of the positions that my poor wife would have to be put through in an effort to just live with me in the past. She has actually told me that the "shoe is on the other foot". I am having some very weird and exciting feelings about all this! Next post I will attempt to flesh out some of these new feelings. Write me and let your feelings known on how you feel about this subject of mine...
